The New Peoplemaking, by Virginia Satir

The New Peoplemaking is a revised and updated version of the book Peoplemaking that Virginia Satir wrote in 1972. Both are based on Satir's observations as a family therapist. In her practice, she observed four key areas which continually surfaced: self-worth (feelings about the self and others), communication (the ways of working out meaning between people), family system (the rules governing feelings and actions), and link to society (the ways family members interacted with those outside the family). Troubled families universally had members with low levels of self worth, communications patterns that were indirect or dishonest, and rigid systems of rules. These families related to the rest of society in ways that were fearful, placating, and blaming. Untroubled families had the opposite characteristics. Members had high levels of self-worth, clear communications with each other, and rules that were flexible and appropriate. These families related to society in ways that were hopeful and enabled members to make choices about such interactions.

Satir invites the reader to explore these areas in his or her own family life, evaluating the current level of self-worth, communication patterns, rules governing living, and the degree of openness in the family system. There are a number of exercises in these chapters to assist the reader in exploring these areas. The next section discusses the vast number of roles that any one family member plays as well as the incredible number of connections between the members. A couple of physical exercises are included to play out the push and pull of these connections that are normally experienced only in thoughts and feelings. After establishing these understandings, Satir then presents ways of designing or reworking the family system to produce healthier individuals.

The final sections of the book describe the human life cycle, spirituality, and the family in society. Satir affirms the humanity and value of every individual at any point in the life cycle. Childhood (including adolescence), adulthood and the senior years are described in detail. Spirituality is briefly touched on as an innate part of all life. In the final chapters, Satir explains her theory of how a better society can be created by building better families.

This book has a number of uses. It could be used almost by itself in a parenting class. Although she bases her models on the traditional family of father-mother-children, Satir does address at length the needs of non-traditional families of many different configurations and the particular challenges each form of family faces. A number of the exercises could be useful, and even fun, in a family retreat setting. The book is not difficult to read; however, it contains a wealth of information. While that might make it daunting to some people, this is a book I could recommend to others without reservation.

I recommend this book as a solid overview of family life and a help to parents, particularly parents who are seeking a new and better way than what they experienced as children. Because it focuses on the family as a whole, not just individual members, I think it is important reading for anyone who would be dealing with families, or a number of family members, in a counseling situation. I am thinking in particular of clergy and others in congregations who provide support to families in grief or other difficult situations. The counselor who recommended this book to me credited it with giving her the courage to actually go into the family's home as an observer when doing work with families.

As a parent, Satir's view of parenting resonated with the right notes and inspired my own aims for my family. I was in agreement with much of what she said. Reading this book has made me far more conscious lately of how I speak to my children and respond to them. I don't always do it "right," but I'm becoming more consistent.

The New Peoplemaking